Yes, I do Love Green Taco Sauce

I love La Victoria Green Taco Sauce.  In my opinion if I am going to slather something on my tacos this green goodness is what I crave.  I have tried many other green and some red taco sauces and nothing can even compare to this brand.  My wife introduced me to the condiment in the first year we were together.  My commitment to both have withstood the test of time.   While we lived in Rolla, La Victoria was a staple on our shopping list and easily acquired at Kroger's.  Of course there are no Kroger's in St Louis anymore and with much search I have discovered only international grocery stores carry the stuff.  Weird considering the company is owned by Hormel, but I digress.

Because La Victoria Green Taco Sauce is scare in St Louis, I have taken to hoarding the stuff.  Whenever I find some I clear out the shelf.  However, I must be one in a small minority because most places that do carry the stuff only carry a couple of bottles.  Last week I proudly paid for five bottles and told the cashier I had cleaned them out.  She looked at me like I was some freaky green taco sauce eater, which I am.  I was almost giddy as I walked out of the store fondling my bag.

I love the green taco sauce on Mexican food, but it is yummy on baked potatoes, eggs, all kinds of sandwiches, and my favorite grilled cheese.  I often toast bread put on slices of cheese and spread on the sauce to nuke later for my lunch at work.  That little spot of green in the middle of my work day makes me smile like I have a secret ingredient on my toast. Just thinking about it makes me want to have that sandwich right now...

Wedding Bells and Old Friends

The Newlyweds

I have a trio of weddings coming up in the next weeks.  They run the gambit from old friends, family, and another trip to Iowa.  I went to the first weddings today.  I was lucky (my word for the year) to be invited to the nuptials of a woman who I have known since kindergarten.  In other words most of my life.  She has always had the prettiest hair of anyone have I known.  I can remember sitting behind her in class and always wanting to touch her hair. 

Toothy Grins Were the Accessory of the Day

With my family in tow we went en mass to Ozark Outdoors (http://www.ozarkoutdoors.net/) for a very simple, but lovely afternoon wedding.  The bride was radiant, her dress perfect, and those gorgeous tresses of hers beautifully arranged.  I saw my friend smile like I have never seen her smile, she truly glowed with love.  Her new husband beamed with happiness as well.  I can only wish the two them the best in their new life.

Two of My Favorite People

I spent the late afternoon surrounded by my family, and other guests, basking in the celebration of two lives.  Other then the beautiful dresses and happy couple, I think the thing I liked best was the fact that everyone brought their dogs with them and with the doors open the canines came in and out of the reception enjoying the festivities as well.  I left the party feeling happy for my friend and glad to have had such a wonderful afternoon with my family. 

One down two weddings to go.

Dreaming About My Dad

As you dear reader know I have been working very hard to deal with the grief of losing my father.  I feel I am doing better.  So much better that I stopped seeing a therapist in June.  I am remembering my dad and talking about him more without my throat starting to close up and tears springing to my eyes.  If I were to give myself a grade, I was say I am at a B. 

That is not to say I don't think about my dad and miss him, I do everyday.  I can still see his face and I remember the sound of his voice.  I think the problem is sometimes I forget that he is gone.  Last night I dreamed about my dad.  I dreamed my phone rang and when I answered the phone I could hear his voice saying my name over and over again like he could not hear me.  The dream was so real I woke up crying, "Dad, I'm here!"  I was startled and immediately grabbed my phone to call him back.  It wasn't until I got to my contacts list that I discovered I had no listing for "Dad." It was then I remembered I would need a much more powerful network to call him.

Those moments are hard.  Very hard.  I have to re-experience the trauma of loss all over again.  I feel like all the air has rushed out of my lungs and I can't breath.  I think it must be the same for most us in dealing with grief.  As much as it hurts today I got up and went to work and pasted on that fake everything is good smile and went on with my life.  However, a part of me wishes I hadn't woke up and I could have just heard my dad talk to me just a little longer.  Yes,  I still miss my dad.

The Woman Who Loved Scarves

Trillian Scarf for my mother

Lately, I have been knitting scarves lots of scarves.  Scarves for me, a scarves for others, long ones and short ones, elegant and crazy scarves.  I dream about scarves, count them like sheep to help me sleep,  and right now I trying to decide which one to knit next.  I guess you could say I like scarves.

Trillian scarf for me

Before I started knitting I collected scarves of all sizes.  I preferred the really long ones that I could swish around my neck in a knock things off tables kind of way.  It is no surprise that when it comes to knitting projects I am known for super sizing everything often with tragic (in a mock epic kind of way) results.  One of my recent knitted scarves, a luscious bamboo blend diagonal pattern, was almost half done when I decided it was not going to be long enough.  I ripped out the scarf and started over again with fewer stitches so I could have a longer end product.

Bamboo blend diagonal scarf

The diagonal scarf in the end was 58 inches, but it just seemed too short for me.  With this in mind I started on an ambitious project using all my various stashed sari silk and ribbons and a funky yarn I had scored at Tuesday Morning.  I did not swatch, it was after all a scarf.  I knitted through my three day weekend while watching Top Gear.  I think the end product is fabulously sumptuous.  Colorful sari ribbons and recycled silk running in vibrant colors the length of my creation.  I refuse to divulge the actual end measurement, but between friends, it is about double the diagonal scarf. 

Sari Scarf

I know when I am gone they will find cabinets, wardrobes, drawers, and closets full of scarves.  I just hope they understand that I was a woman who truly loved scarves.

Happy Half-iversary To Us

Today my beautiful wife and I have made it to the halfway mark of our first year together as a married couple.  Granted we have over two and half decades of experience together, today we are still technically newly-weds.  I think about that game show, The Newlywed Game, and wonder how we would fare.  I have to think we would do just about as well as the other couples.  There are so many things we still don't know about each other and we still disagree about many things.  I wonder if even a life time together will be enough to share with Natalie.  Or if one day I will just snap and kill her (I know, but the more you love someone, the more you want to kill them does have some relavance).

Photo by the talented Sungazing Photography

I also think about how far we have come from the two teenagers from Crawford County struggling with our feelings for one another.  I can remember being shocked that ever time I saw her my heart beat faster and how she would give me a lopsided grin and my knees would turn to water.  Time and familiarity does change some of those the feelings, but then she will give me another of those lopsided grins and my heart still thumps a little harder and my knees weaken.  And I think maybe I don't want to kill her,  just yet.   

Three Days Off

I feel a deep sigh of relief as I sit here on my futon with my feet up, blogging, and watching Top Gear.  I have three whole days off.  No library, no crabby customers, or annoying phone beeping in my ear.  I will spend the next three days knitting, hanging out with friends, sleeping late, drinking ice tea, and starting to feel like my real self again.  I have really only a few goals.  I will do laundry, take out the trash, update my checkbook, and organize my knitting patterns.  Yes you heard me right.  I will drag out a stack of patterns organize them into neat little categories and file them in color coded notebooks.  Yup, lucky me, I am living large.   Don't envy me too much.